


Fantasies

by Space_Interrobang



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Soulmate-Identifying Timers, siren!au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-25
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-08-07 12:29:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16408523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Space_Interrobang/pseuds/Space_Interrobang
Summary: In a world where everyone is born with a timer that counts down to your soulmates death, can't other fantasies be true as well?





	Fantasies

Burning and choking. Every limb on fire as you sink deeper under the current. An inferno in your veins. Pulling them. Pressuring them until holes tear. You try to take in air. To get strength. To search for light. There is only a luminescent shimmer. A flash of a flicker that crosses in front of your cloudy vision. You reach out even as you kick blindly. A fuzzy black ring closing in around you. The burning fills your chest. It surrounds you. It becomes a part of you, and your body continues convulsing. Throat constricting in spasms to keep out everything even as the rest of your body screams to breathe. The pressure has quit pulling and now crushes you from all around. Blue and black and grey swirl around you, taking you with them. Urging you to dance with them. You no longer have strength to resist. No longer reaching. There is no up or down. Left or right. You’re suspended in the cold. Alone. Numb. Thoughts drifting back on how you got to this point.

There’s this cave. It requires a boat to get there. A small one. Usually your dinghy. You row it there every time you want to get away. Which is a lot. The entrance is set back among a long coastline of cliffs. The centuries of waves beating on the base of them created a field of jagged rocks and seaweed that no other type of boat could sail through. And you knew how to navigate them. You knew the best path through the rough surf to get to a small strip of shore. It wasn’t very wide or long, and there was no sand. Only fragments of rock that had been chipped away from the cliff. Just enough space to shore your dinghy so it would stay put while you went to your secret hideaway.

Once there you could enter the cave one of two ways. Climbing or swimming. Typically you did the former because you liked to bring books with you and couldn’t get them too wet for fear of ruining them. You had a drawing journal you brought often as well. The pages crinkled and uneven from so much salt spray. It was getting to be brittle but you couldn’t let go of your treasured sketches. Although you worried you would bring the pencil to the paper one day and it would crack and crumble like thin pastry sheets.

The reason for your books and journals: your muse. The life force of your passion. The subject of all your art since meeting him. Your obsession. A myth to most people. A child’s fairytale, or a warning to sailors out on the open seas. A siren by the name of Yixing.

When you first saw him you were sure your eyes were deceiving you. There you sat in your favorite spot on the planet. Your hideaway cave surrounded by stone. The white noise of churning waves shut out since there was no direct exit or entrance. The almost completed circle of water that you had your feet dangling in. It was practically a second home, this secret cove of yours. That day you were reading as comfortably as ever. Then something brushed your shin. You dismissed it as seaweed at first. There was a patch that grew there. Surely it was tall enough to reach you by then. Except after a moment you felt a stronger touch on the sole of your foot. Like something rubbing up towards your toes, and you gasped sharply. Yanking your legs out of the pool and searching the deep blue water for signs of a fish that might have wandered in. Separated from its school. Heart pounding in your chest. Setting your book aside. You spotted a glimmer of scales and sighed in relief. Speaking to the unidentified fish like it could understand you.

“Hey there. You gave me a scare. How’d you get so far away from the rest of your family, huh?” Not expecting anything else to happen you crossed your legs under you. Settling in to continue reading until the light played tricks with your eyes. Or so you thought at first. That couldn’t be a face…could it? The dark, cold waters were hard to see through. You continued to stare until you could make out eyes…and a nose…and holy shit a man just stuck his head out from the water. His pure black hair stuck to his forehead and stopped just above his piercing dark eyes. The first things you saw of him. Followed by his sharp nose and pale, soft lips. Taking in his elegantly shaped jaw and cheekbones. You were so taken aback that someone else had found your secret cave that you failed to notice him coming closer at first. Not until his hands were on you. Then you were in shock. He unfolded one leg and held it delicately. Studying the shape of it. An intense focus you had never witnessed before in his brown eyes. Your gaze wandered and your cheeks flushed at the sight of his bare torso. The edge of the water licking at his chest. The slope of his left shoulder catching your attention. There were scales. Honest to goodness scales on him. A small patch of white, almost silver, scales perfectly integrated with his flesh. Scalloped and layered and you found yourself reaching out without thought, but your wrist was caught before you could feel if they were real. The mystery person staring into your very soul. Not glaring, but intimidating all the same. His hold on your wrist gentle. The heat radiating off his skin was a refreshing respite from the cold that always permeated this area. How was he so hot in such freezing water? No one should be swimming that time of year. But he was and for some reason you couldn’t seem to speak your concerns as he let you go. Slowly lowering your hand. Swallowing nervously.

Then his attention went back to your leg. Fingertips grazing up your bare calf then down to your foot. Making you shiver. Rotating your ankle then pinching your big toe. You wiggled your toes so he’d let go and his eyes went wide like he’d never seen such a thing before. Jumping back. You giggled at his reaction and drew your leg back under you. Leaning forward on the rock ledge. He drifted away out of reach like he was afraid. So you smiled to ease his worries.

“What’s your name?” No answer. “How’d you find my cave?” His eyebrows drew together incredulously.

“You’re the one who stole my cave.” He had a soft voice, you noted. Not airy, but light. Calming. Like the light of a sunset casting over snowy mountains and reflecting its beauty. With a tinge of some otherworldly pressure behind it. Like if he wanted to he could kill you with his voice alone. Enchanting you. It drew your curiosity further. “This was my favorite spot to eat clams until you came in with your webless feet and dry hair.” You ignored the odd jab. Now that you knew he could speak to you you began worrying again.

“Come out of the water first. You’ll catch your death in that cold.” No response. You extended a hand. “Come on. How are you not freezing right now?” He spoke your name in reply. You blinked at him a few times. How did he…?

Before you could ask one corner of his mouth quirked up in a playful smirk. Then he turned and dove under the water. Instead of seeing legs kicking him under his back arched as he went. Showing you a fishes’ spine connected to his lower back. As it continued you realized he had dove like a dolphin or whale, and what normally would follow would be his backside then his legs; instead was a wave of scales. Deep green with flecks of white or silver. The same shades as the seaweed that grew all around these cliffs. Except with a slight shimmer. And fins. Two sets of them. One just below where his knees would have been that floated around like rose petals, and a second similar to a whale. Smacking the surface of the water and splashing you a little before disappearing into the underwater tunnel that lead here.

The moment you came back to your senses you were drawing in the margins of your book. His intense, focused eyes. His tail. The scales by his collarbone. Any detail you could remember was put to paper. Rushing back to the cave the next day as quickly as possible with extra blankets and your sketchbook. You sat there all day trying to fill in the gaps and make a complete picture of him, but it never quite came together like you wanted. He didn’t return either. Not to your knowledge anyway. Not for three weeks. When the waters were beginning to warm and you had left your notebook unattended for a few minutes to stretch your legs. The mysterious siren was wading in the water flipping through your drawings when you returned. Looking exactly the same. Only his face was twisted in confusion.

“Are these supposed to be me?” You gaped like an idiot at first. Your heartrate speeding up dangerously. Your memory did him no justice whatsoever. You thought you had mimicked him pretty well before, but looking at him again…only the eyes were spot on. Focused. Flickering up to meet yours as he waited for an answer.

“Not…all of them,” you lied. He pressed his lips together in a small frown, closed the journal, and threw it back on the rock.

“None of them look anything like me.”

“I know…” you admitted quietly. Kneeling by the edge of the pool. Unable to take your gaze off him for even a second. Truly observing all the curves in his face. “I wasn’t able to see you very well before.” His frown was replaced by that smirk from before. Glinting with mischief. He swam closer. Hands going to the rock ledge on either side of you. Raising himself up to be eye level with you. The water starting just at his navel. Which at the time you never gave a second thought of him having. Too distracted by the sweet smile on his lips and the warm look in his eyes. His face leaning closer to yours.

“Would you like to get a better look?” he spoke softly. Seducing you with his almost sing-song tone. You nodded automatically. He chewed on his bottom lip a moment. Watching you. You felt this invisible pull to close the gap. To kiss him. Putting your weight forward. Yet the space stayed the same until–  
Your balance was gone, and then the rock under you was gone. Shock jolting up your entire body as you were submerged in the cold water. Eyes shooting open to search for light. To search for the surface. Body twisting and flailing. Until his face was in front of you again. His hands holding either side of your head. Keeping you still. Your heart calmed instantly. Like some kind of spell to bring peace to your mind. You were able to see him completely like that. He looked…different underwater. Almost glowing. His dark hair floating around his head. A deep sadness lurking and twisting with the brown in his irises. His skin pale and obvious against the deep blue and black around him. The faint light that fractured hitting the water caught his scales and lit up the small area. Even the deep green that made up the majority of what covered his tail was ethereal. Curled behind him as his secondary fins worked to keep himself in place. The transition around his waist to skin uneven but flawless all the same. Another small patch of white scales like his shoulder on his side, and a third you learned of later on his back beside his spine that was more like a claw mark than a patch. Remnants of a run-in with a pod of killer whales. He lifted a hand. Stroking his fingers through your hair as it drifted like a cloud around your head. Taking the sight of you in his element in.

Then you were being lifted and you both breached the surface. You gasped and flung a hand out to grasp rock. Steadying yourself. Pushing your wet hair out of your face. The siren in front of you continued to smile. Close lipped and amused. His hands on your waist. Fingers sneaking under your wet clothes to feel your skin on his.

“This is much better,” he murmured.

“Y-you could’ve killed me,” you stammered. The chill making your jaw tremble. He came closer. Chest pressed to yours and the warmth from him was astounding. Naturally staying near to keep the heat on you. Seeping into you.

“I would never harm you.”

“Y-you’re every sailors w-worst nightmare. That’s ex-exactly w-what you would say.”

“Perhaps,” he cooed back gently. “In another lifetime…my brothers…” You glanced up to see those intense eyes trained on you. That sadness you glimpsed at peeking through. Thought unfinished. Washed away like sand. One of his hands raised. Thumb stroking your cheek. “That doesn’t matter. Focus on me. I want your memory to be as accurate as possible. And I want to remember you like this.”

“You could just stay and model for me while I draw.” He didn’t listen. Pulling you closer. Cradling you with one arm. So you studied him as best you could as he seemed to do the same. Gaze sweeping down to where your bodies were smushed together. Lazily kicking your legs out of habit even though he was the one keeping you in place. Now that you were seeing him better you noticed marks on his side. They were very subtle, but they looked like three faint scratches on either side of him just above his hips. Sitting just under the water. Gills. As you continued watching they flowed open and shut once smoothly. Allowing him to breathe.

“Will you read to me if I model for you?” he asked.

“Read to you?” you repeated distractedly. Gaze wandering slowly back up to meet his.

“Yes. I’d love to learn more about your stories. I see you reading them all the time.”

“Oh. You…watch me read?”

“I love watching you make funny faces at the pages,” he chuckled. “I want to share that with you. All our knowledge is passed orally. I miss having ways to preserve everything exactly as it’s intended.”

“And if I do you’ll stay while I draw you?”

“I swear it.”

“Alright,” you agreed. The word leaving your lips without you ever telling it to. He grinned. Bright and happy.

That’s how your curiosity toward him completely ensnared you. As time passed you met more and more. You reading to him, sketching him, talking to him. Learning everything you could about the ocean from him. He was so young looking, but wise beyond what you knew. It was amazing and thrilling; sneaking off from your duties to spend time with him. Your forbidden secret affairs with a siren. He even had a soulmate marker like you, but he avoided any topic about it. That was, until you told him of yours.

You remembered that afternoon well. It was five months after first meeting. You were discussing similarities between the two of you. Showing him the timer by your hip. Numbers set to zero. Sitting right on the edge of the rock so he could examine it closer. You were comfortable around Yixing. You never worried he would try to drag you under the waves to drown and devour you like the tales said. He was a kind and gentle spirit. Much like any other person you interacted with. Only with him you always felt this extra spark. A pull. Like your heart was calling out to him. But you always dismissed those feelings as his inexplainable magic. So you dismissed it again as his fingertips brushed over the numbers. Staring forlornly at the scar that would forever mark your loneliness. The stamp of an outcast. Burdened to never know the love of another.

Yixing had been out of the water speaking to you for so long his hair was dry. Coarse and wavy from the saltwater. Leaning in so near your blood was racing. He had never known the limits of personal space, but you didn’t mind. Most of the time. It only became a problem when he would touch you more freely. Palms sliding up higher than you could handle without sputtering like a lunatic. You didn’t have to worry about more salacious intentions since he never expressed interest. Only curiosity of your form. Or on rare occasions while he thought you were too distracted to notice; a nostalgic sort of envy. The look on his face that day was sad and tired. Thoughts drifting as he continued to trace the zeros on your skin. Making you shudder at the ghostly touch.

“How long ago?” he asked softly.

“It’s been that way as long as I can remember.” Your answer surprised him, but not enough to look up from your hip. Resting his other arm on the rock, and his chin on his arm. You laid down on your back. Staring at the stone ceiling. Hands on your stomach. “I’ve grown fond of the idea of being the old town shrew,” you chuckled. “Pestering kids to get away from my house and growing a big garden.”

“I don’t think it suits you.”

“Yeah? What does suit me then?”

“A family,” he answered unquestionably. “Kids to feed with whatever you grow in your garden. A partner to spoil you with everything you could desire.”

“Easy for you to say,” you replied wistfully. “You still have time left.”

“Not much.”

“How much?”

“Ten days.”

“Oh. I didn’t know. Did you…at least get a chance to meet?”

“I think so.”

“What does that mean? Aren’t you supposed to just know with soulmates?”

“It’s more complicated than that. I’d have to leave my family.”

“Right. Your brothers.”

“They need my guidance. I can’t just abandon them.”

“Can’t you? For those ten days at least?”

“It doesn’t–If I leave…”

“You can’t go back?” you finished. Craning your neck to glance at him. He nodded and hummed to confirm you were right. He lowered his voice to a whisper.

“They say it’s like dying all over again.”

“Losing your soulmate?” Yixing paused. Retracting his fingers from your skin. Adding that arm to the pile under his chin then tilting his head so his cheek rested on them instead. Face towards you. The water lapping at the rock the only noise for a while. Your gaze wandered the curve of his back for a moment. Then he said three words you never thought were possible together. It was too ridiculous to entertain. A fantasy. Then again…wasn’t his whole existence supposed to be fantasy?

“Turning human again.” You bolted upright.

“Again?” Yixing remained calm. Like someone who’s resolved themselves to their fate. He had decided to tell you. All those questions about his past, how his people came to be, how he could have brothers but no parents and a bellybutton, and a soulmate timer. He was going to share it all finally. Only you couldn’t help but feel conflicted about it. Did that mean something bad was going to happen soon? Why now of all times? It didn’t matter because he continued even as your mind stumbled to keep up. Raising his head and picking at the tiny pebbles in a crack in the rock. Avoiding your eyes.

“We’re the ones left to die,” he began. “The abused. The abandoned. It’s said Poseidon felt pity on us and saved us by bringing us to the ocean. As long as we have our tails we have our voices too. The ability to live freely. Free to take revenge on the humans who hated and mistreated us for only existing. Sinking their ships with our songs. Which is what most of my brothers and sisters do. Or…we can return to shore. Wait for the sun to dry up our scales and return the function of our lungs and legs to us. It’s meant to be painful. A punishment for rejecting Poseidon’s gift. Most don’t survive, but most are only babies. They don’t know how to swim so they…I’ve never…I’ve never known an adult to try.” Your eyes went wide. The toddlers and newborns fisherman would find on the banks and beaches. It was always assumed that they were unfortunate wash-ups from shipwrecks. But to be abandoned by their parents only to drown…and Yixing had died too. All his brothers and sisters…you reached out for Yixing’s hand. Halting his pebble picking. Your eyes met and you clasped your fingers around his tightly. Voice wavering. The implications that his soulmate was human. That he might risk his family, his life for just ten days with them. That he might not.

“Yixing,” you called gently. “I know it’s not my place to give advice here. I know you must have gone through so much hurt in your life…but I’d give up everything to spend ten days with my soulmate. Hell, I’d give up everything for ten days with you. Ten minutes, even.”

“You…you would?”

“I know,” you laughed weakly. “What does a woman with a soulmate who’s been dead since she was born have to risk by running off with you? But I would. If you asked.”

“Alright.”

“Alright?” Yixing tugged on your joined hands. Bringing you down to his level. His other going to cup your face. Now only inches away. The determination in his eyes. The heat. The affection. You found it hard to breathe in such a suffocating atmosphere. Yet you wanted nothing more than to stay.

“I’ll run away with you.”

That was how you ended up in your position. After Yixing made his decision you were ecstatic to be with him. Making plans to start a new life outside the reach of his family. Your own family used to have a place by a lake that met with the ocean through a river. You could go there. Spend every day with Yixing without worries. He wanted to wait with you until his timer ran out; then you could live without soulmates together. He said he wanted you by his side when it happened. So you prepared extra food and clothes. Going to tuck them away in your cave and comfort him until the time passed. The next thing you knew everything was grey and blue and black. Lungs burning. Limbs quickly going numb. Throat strangling itself to keep you from breathing saltwater. Drifting with the currents. The fire eating all the oxygen in your veins. Black closing in your vision. Numbness dousing the flames. Muscles frozen. Everything was so cold. So lonely. So…nothing. Life flashing and yet all you saw was Yixing. Wanting him to hold your hand. Bring you the warmth he always had. Cradle you in his arms and stare at you with that intense, curious expression in his eyes. You were fated from birth to spend your whole life alone, so you suppose it was only fitting you died alone. But you wanted him with you. Even just to see him smile one last time. Because you loved him. Damn soulmates. You loved Yixing. Now he’d never know. You thought you saw a flicker of deep green scales…and you went slack.

Suddenly the flames returned in your chest. Climbing up your throat. And you coughed violently. Rolling onto your side instinctually. Vomiting up the liquid you swallowed while drowning. Eyes, nose and chest burning with salt and bile. Your whole body trembling uncontrollably. Fingers curling into loose rocks. You were on the shore. Pins and needles prickling at every inch of your hands and feet as proper blood flow returned to them. The breeze only intensifying the icy feeling. You spit out the last of the ocean water and took two very slow breaths shakily. Cautious of any lingering fluid. Coughing and wincing as your throat felt like you just finished swallowing razors. Your chest throbbing like someone just punched you. Then you felt the heat and weight of someone touching your shoulder. When you looked up Yixing was there smiling. And crying. Streaks of tears staining his face even as his teeth glinted in the sun. He was paler than normal. You tried to say his name, but you weren’t ready to speak yet. He understood the word your lips formed nonetheless. Then collapsed forward. Tackling you to the rocks.

“You’re back,” he whispered against your ear. “When your heart stopped I thought–” He cut himself off. Changing it from a maybe to a definite. Telling you. “You died. But you’re alive again. You’re here. I was right.” Yixing pulled away from you suddenly. You blinked in shock as he pointed to his side. Where one of his patches of scales usually were. A timer set to zero. “You’re my soulmate.” His hands were on your face then. Cajoling you to sit up and meet his eyes. Tearing your vision away from the rest of him before you could properly absorb the information. His fingers were colder than normal. Everything was racing and dizzy. “We can be together now. Just you and me. I’ve imagined it so many times; sitting in a house listening to you read. Laying beside you at night. Starting a family.”

“How…” Your voice was quiet. Barely a whisper so as not to agitate your throat too much. “…are we here?”

“Fate, my love,” he answered with a glow about him.

“But…I died?”

“Oh, you meant…” Yixing stroked your cheek with his thumb. His smile dimming. “One of my brothers tried to drown you so I’d stay. I swam you to shore so I could save you. I was too late, but I couldn’t just…let you lay there dead because of me.”

“But…your…” The sentence trailed. He needed lungs to perform CPR, so how were you alive? His hands fell from your face as you turned. Your eyes widening as your gaze flitted down his form. The scales by his collarbone were missing. Instead a scar like a long-faded burn was there. And further down. Legs. Yixing had legs. Limp and laying on the rocks. Two pale legs with feet and skin and knees and–

Your gaze shot up to the cliff behind him. Voice coarse and scratchy like you just gargled rocks as you stated the obvious.

“You’re naked.” Out of the corner of your eyes you saw him look down on his newly recovered legs then back to you confused. Unaware and unashamed. As always.

“Yes. I am. Aren’t you happy?” That snapped your focus back to his face. Your cheeks gaining color despite your body still being racked with shivers. He had climbed out of the water. Gone through the immense pain of his scales being stripped away. He gave up his family. Sacrificed everything in a split second. Just so he could have the use of his lungs back to save you. Because he thought you were soulmates. And he was right. You had died exactly as his timer said. Now you were alive again because of him. Your vision filled with tears until you blinked them away. Running down your face. Responding in a whispered breath.

“How could I not be?”

“Then why are you crying?”

“Because I love you.” Yixing was stunned only long enough for you to smell the ocean spray nearby. Crisp and refreshing as the waves beat on the base of the cliff. The tide was coming in. Then he tackled you to the rocks again. Crashing his lips onto yours. Shaking but sure as the pressure ebbed around your upper lip. Urging your mouth open. His hands holding you close by the nape of your neck and waist. Your own arms coming around his bare torso. Fingers tangling in his damp hair as his shivering frame pressed tightly to yours. Feeling the water lick at your toes. You both would need to go back to the cave where you hid extra clothes and return to your place for true warmth by a fire. But it didn’t matter right then. Because you could go anywhere. There was always that place by the lake. You even knew a good spot where you could start a garden. With Yixing it could be a home for both of you. Together. Never to part again.


End file.
